Saturday, September 26, 2015

Looking ahead

I go through waves of being successful in writing a blog and then I go through phases of completely sucking at it. I have been in one of those phases recently.

Life is happening so rapidly. I feel like I blinked and my baby turned one. I thought I had all summer to prepare for his birthday party but summer flew by in what felt like a week. I threw things together with the help of a very supportive husband and mother. Thank you both! I love you and appreciate you!

We are now days away from my birthday. It has creeped up on me and the only reason I know my birthday is coming is because I looked at the date, realized tomorrow is my best friend, Kelsey's, birthday which is exaclty one week from my birthday...

What are my birthday plans you ask? No idea. In fact, I think I will keep the fact that my birthday is coming on the down low because if people start asking me about plans I won't have an answer. I'm ok with it but it's not what people expect.

So here we are. Days from October (best month of the year). With so much to look forward to. I see Fall Festivals, Pumpkins, Halloween, falling leaves, Thanksgiving, snow, and Christmas in the very near future. I am thrilled at the chance to experience all of this in a whole new way with my sweet husband and adventurous growing boy!

Thursday, September 24, 2015


I look in the mirror everyday. Usually multiple times a day. I often scrutinize over the rapidly appearing wrinkles and wonder how I simultaneously end up dealing with breakouts... Which seem like those of a teenager. Not fair.

I have scars and freckles and laugh lines and crows feet. None of which are desirable physical attributes to have when you are in your twenties. I look at myself and wish I was different. That I didn't have these permanent reminders of passing time and troubled days.

And then I look at my son.

My son's skin is pale and perfect. It is pure and innocent and unmarked from the affects of the sun or the earth. He is unblemished. 

Recently I have noticed his knees have become rough from crawling and from falling in his failed attempts to walk. His innocent and inexperienced young skin is starting to lose its purity. He will soon have rough patches, scars from his many falls, and freckles from the sun (he is his mother's son after all). 

God is funny like that. 

Our skin is truly only skin deep, just the exterior. Our body are beautiful and in a way perfect at every stage of life but they are the shell of what matters. Our souls. Our bodies, our skin, reflects the soul. 

Every scar I bare, every wrinkle... It is part of me.

One day my perfect little boy will have wrinkles and scar like mine because he lived life well. It is part of growing up. It saddens part of me but stirs up joy in another. 

God's design is incredible to me.